She sat across the table from me, a living specimen of suffering and hardship. Life had done murder on her soul and heart, leaving her with nothing but a death-grip on the Savior. As I sat at her kitchen table, listening to her story, I couldn't help but wonder why I was placed in this home. What common ground did we have? She had known suffering in it's cruelest forms, what have I felt but a few self-inflicted hurts? She had had loved ones stripped from her, while my family is still intact. She had bourn the weight of addictions, while I've been spared that temptation. She had felt rejection and denial, while I have been embraced and loved. So, why was I here?
Maybe just to teach me something about life. She poured out her soul, unveiling some of the hidden wounds that had yet to be healed, the wounds inflicted by the daggers of her life's circumstances. I couldn't help but look at my life in perspective to her's. In my ignorance and folly, I thought that I had suffered in my life. I thought that I had known real pain. I thought that I had a reason to cover myself with sackcloth and ashes, and wear my struggles on my sleeve.
I am so foolish. For me to think that I have had a hard life, that I've seen some harsh times, is utter folly. What has it been? Only the emotional pain of having a few broken hearts. That's all. When I compare my life to her's, I realize the ignorance of my heart to what pain and suffering is. How shallow I am to think that because of my immature heart's "suffering," I have acquired great wisdom, that I feel that I have any reason to boast of my "struggles." When in truth, SHE has struggled. SHE has suffered. SHE had know pain.
Who am I to do anything, but stand here and admit to my denying self, that what I have felt has been petty and yes, self inflicted. I have not suffered. I have made myself a martyr, when there was no real fires, no real tortures, no real whipping posts, no real reason.
From this tired and wounded, yet still radiant women, I have learned something that I will never forget.
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